1. Telling children you’re in the 25th grade.告诉孩子们爸爸在读二十五年级。




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2. It’s been at least 10 years since you had a “real” weekend.
发现自己至少已经10年没有过一个真正的周末了。




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3. Realizing your vocabulary is permanently scattered with words like “problematic” and “ontological” and “hegemony.”
发现已经不会讲人话了，脑海中始终充满了“有问题的”、“本体论”和“霸权主义”之类的词。




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4. Coming up with all of your good ideas in the shower…
好的想法总是在冲澡时一涌而出。。。


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…and no good ideas during your oral defense.

。。。答辩的时候大脑永远一片空白。

5. Going to parties and everyone’s just standing around talking about their research.
去个聚会发现所有人都在讨论他们的研究。




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…because none of you are in touch with pop culture in the slightest.

。。。因为没有人了解他们研究领域外的东西！

6. When your undergrads ask constantly, “Is this going to be on the exam?”
你的本科生最常问你的是：这个会考吗？（国外的研究生都需要做教学助理，即TA）




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7. Your average dinner is a bag of frozen vegetables topped with leftover shredded cheese and hot sauce.
你的晚饭标配是泡面、速冻水饺或者昨天的剩饭。




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8. When someone claims that being in a doctoral program isn’t “the same thing as having a real job”:
人们总是说： 读博和工作不是一样的吗？




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9. Trying to date another Ph.D. student:
想约见另一位博士生童鞋：




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10. Unironically referring to the library or the lab as “home.”
你说图书馆或者实验室是你家，一点也不讽刺。


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11. …and feeling ultra-guilty anytime you try to relax.
每次放松一下就罪恶感爆棚。




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12. Finding an old paper you wrote your first year of grad school:
发现你研一的一篇旧论文：好吧，没有比这个更胡扯的论文了。


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13. Realizing where most of your stipend went.
发现你的奖助学金都花在了.....外卖......




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14. When master’s degree students complain about their workload, you’re just like:
当听到研究生们抱怨他们的工作量，你就....




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15. Trying to make non-academic small talk with your advisor at a reception:
试图和你导师在聚餐的时候说一些和研究无关的话题：




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16. When all of your colleagues are married, and you’re just like:
发现你的同事都已经结婚了，你只想说：




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17. Feeling some degree of “impostor syndrome” at least once a day.
每天都不止一次觉得自己有点像“江湖骗子”。


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…as in, you’re just waiting for someone to realize that they made a HUGE mistake letting you into your program and to swiftly kick you out.

你只是等着某天有人发现你这个猪一样的队友，然后把你踢走...

18. When someone asks you for the 357th time what your dissertation is about:
当某人第357次问你的论文是做什么的：




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19. How you feel when your annual conference is in Hawaii:
当你要参加的会议在夏威夷举行：

Hawaii.

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… versus Rochester:。。。或者是罗彻斯特：





20. Seeing someone on your dissertation committee outside of school:
在校外猛然看到答辩委员会的老师，你立刻：




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21. Grading your undergrads’ papers:
给本科生论文打分：




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22. When someone asks how “writing” is going:
当有人问你的论文写得怎么样了：




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23. Trying to say something romantic to your significant other after a long day of coursework:
改了一天作业之后你只想对你的另一半说：




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24. Explaining to your friends with 9-to-5 jobs why you can’t go out on Friday night.
和你那些朝九晚五工作的小伙伴解释为什么你周五晚上不能出去。




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25. When ANYONE asks you what your plan is after you graduate:
当任何人问你毕业后有什么打算的时候：